For a Minute There, I started meditating and wondering if I was making a mistake by leaving this company. You know those times when you are performing mindless work and your mind starts wondering like a rollercoaster's twists and turns. I wondered if I would miss out on meeting any of the 'cool' celebrities or if I would miss out on the dire and seemingly boring experience that every intern has forced upon them in the entertainment industry.
Will I miss reading scripts, will I miss not being talked to by peers, will I miss this place? Yeah, even hours before my final moment, I tend to think about the 'ups' of reading relatively good scripts, but that is all I am doing: reading other individuals expressions of personal creativity. I think that's when I realize that my personal termination will be all worth it when I gain more chances to play basketball with new friends, when I do get to focus on working to the MAX, and just doing what I enjoy for the time being- you know, this is summer [ like my last seemingly -non-real-worldil-summer-before-i-go-over-the-hill-summer]. Why not write the screenplays I am reading? Why not begin the books that I have been talking about for months now? Why not do coverage on my own stuff? Life is all about finding your own expression. It's kinda like I am a hopeless romantic when it comes to my dreams, but I even think that's total bullshit because everything is possible - if you want something, go after it, and allow God to make it yours. It matters not how many times you get knocked down or rejected, but it matters how many times you get back up and say, 'My failures will not overshadow my ultimate success.' I am just too 'rich' to live life as if it is not a present and to think I am just like every other person in this world. According to what we usually read in our local newspapers, my life would be as so:
'I am a black seed born to the hood from premarital sex where my father leaves three weeks prior because his angst is matched with stupidity and ignorance. I become a teenager and begin looking for the love that my parents did not show me. I find it in girls and in the streets gangs that take me in as their family. Toting my gun, I think it can act as a cover for my insecurity and utter wanting of compassion and true love. I either drop out of high school or I get all the way to my senior year. Two weeks before I am set to barely pass and graduate, I get my girlfriend pregnant, I get killed, I lose my life.'
Luckily for me, I was blessed to have such a great immediate family. I have had some negative fish in my sea of friends, but still, I survive. My life has not been a walk in the park, but I also understand that there are some people who have not even been close to 'a walk in society.' I gotta understand that I will meet many setbacks and failures, but I also gotta believe that I can and will be very successful. If you don't believe in yourself, who will? Man of Courage, Woman of Faith, Whatever you may be, be it to the fullest - live it and adorn it. "The future only belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.'
Vandy in Hollywood
University of Dreams
Summer in Beverly Hills
Welcome to the West Coast
Say Hello to Alex
